5招教你異地戀應(yīng)該怎樣談

　　No.1 Video Chat Regularly 第一招：經(jīng)常視頻聊天

　　Whether you use Face Time, iChat, Google Chat, or Skype, being able to see each other while you talk about your annoying coworker or the hilarious thing your buddy did at the bar adds another layer of communication that helps you stay close. Video chatting is an especially good idea when you’re arguing; your normal tension-dissolving tactics don’t translate as well over the phone。

　　什么樣的視頻聊天工具都好，當(dāng)你在抱怨惹人討厭的同事或者分享好伙伴在酒吧里做過的一些非常滑稽的事情的時候，要能看到對方，這樣能夠帶來不同感覺的聊天效果，幫助你們維系彼此間的親密感。當(dāng)你們在爭論的時候，視頻聊天是一個非常好的方式;電話聊天無法很好地傳達(dá)和幫助消除緊張感。

　　No.2 Don't Be Jealous Of Her Guy Friends 第二招：不要嫉妒她的異性朋友

　　One of the few upsides to being in a long-distance relationship is that you’re always free to hang out with friends. Your job as the boyfriend is to make sure she knows you’re cool with that -- even if her plans involve dudes you don’t know. Trust me, it’ll work to your advantage in the long-run: If you get defensive whenever she wants to spend time with a guy, she’ll assume it’s because you’re not being faithful when you’re around other women. But if you’re cool with it, you automatically seem more trustworthy, preventing any major jealousy issues before they start。

　　遠(yuǎn)距離異地戀情中少有的一個好處是：可以很自由的與自己的朋友聚在一起。作為她的男友要做的，就是確保讓她知道，關(guān)于這點你很放心，就算她會與一些你不認(rèn)識的男生一起出門玩。相信我，長期堅持這樣做對你們的關(guān)系是非常有利的：如果每次她說要跟異性朋友一起你就很有防備心，那久而久之，她就會懷疑是不是因為你和其他的女性一起的時候有做過對不起她的事情。但如果你放心她的話，會得到更多的信任，這些信任能夠消除任何重大的猜疑與嫉妒。

　　No.3 Do Something Together While You're Apart 第三招：異地的時候也可以一起做些事

　　You don’t have to be in the same zip code to have fun together. Every Sunday night at 11, my boyfriend and I have a standing date to talk about the latest episode of Breaking Bad. Your “thing” doesn’t have to be a TV series you’re addicted to -- maybe it’s watching a weekly movie together, or playing Words with Friends -- but make sure you have something to talk about that doesn’t involve the words “I miss you�！� It’ll make your phone calls a lot more pleasant。

　　你們不一定非得在同一個地區(qū)才能一起玩。每周六晚11點，我和男朋友會有一次固定的約會，一起聊聊《絕命毒師》的最新劇情。當(dāng)然你們的‘話題’不一定非得是你們熱衷的電視劇，可以是在網(wǎng)上一起觀看每周影院，或者是大家一起玩填字游戲，要知道的除了“我想你”這些甜言蜜語外，你們有其他的事情可以談?wù)�，這些事情會讓你們的電話聊天更愉快。

　　No.4 Plan At Least One Visit In Advance 第四招：至少提前安排一次會面

　　Maybe you’re a spontaneous kind of guy. Don’t be when you’re booking travel. Things go much more smoothly if you have a trip or two in the books ahead of time. Your wallet will thank you -- and so will your girlfriend. Saying goodbye at the end of a visit is a lot easier when you already have another to look forward to。

　　也許你是一個很隨意的人，但在計劃旅行的時候就千萬要謹(jǐn)慎啦。如果你能提前安排一到兩次旅行的話，事情會更順暢。你的錢包也會感激你的，當(dāng)然還有你的女朋友。如果你們已經(jīng)計劃好令人期待的下一次會面時，那么在這段旅途結(jié)束時說再見就會容易得多了。

　　No.5 Say What's On Your Mind 第五招：說出你心中的想法

　　Girlfriends can tell when something’s bothering you. And when you don’t explain what it is -- no matter how dumb you might think it sounds -- we assume we’re the something that’s bringing you down. A girlfriend who’s worried that you might dump her isn’t a great person to be in a relationship with. So just tell her that you missed the game-winning shot at your pickup basketball game already and put it behind you。

　　女朋友通常都能感覺到有事情煩擾著你，不論你多么的不想說話，如果你不去解釋，我們就會以為是我們讓你感到厭煩。作為女朋友會猜疑，擔(dān)心你是不是要跟她分手。所以你要直接的告訴她，你是因為在之前的籃球賽錯失了制勝球而心情煩悶。

　　相關(guān)閱讀：

　　Moaning about one's schedule has become, for some, a mark of social status. We're not speaking here about the kind of busyness associated with scraping by near the povertyline, of course, but rather the kind associated with lives of material privilege. For instance, when you ask a colleague for assistance, he/she may reply like this:"I would like to help but cannot. I am desperately trying to finish a screenplay and a talk I need to give in Milan." Let's call this phenomenon 'busy-bragging'.

　　對某些人來說，抱怨自己的日程有多滿已經(jīng)成為一種社會地位的象征。我們這里說的忙并不是那些掙扎在貧困線上忙著謀生的人，而是與具有物質(zhì)優(yōu)越感的人有關(guān)。比如，你找一個同事幫忙，你聽到的回答可能是：“我很想幫你，可是不行啊。我正忙著寫一個劇本，還有一個要在米蘭演講的講話稿。”我們把這種現(xiàn)象稱為“炫忙”。

　　The interesting but thorny thing about busy-bragging is that most of us who engage in it aren't doing it consciously to impress others. Those busy feelings are absolutely real. That's why it is also known as busyness epidemic.

　　而“炫忙”這件事很有意思又頗具諷刺意味的地方在于，我們絕大多數(shù)說忙的人并不是為了讓別人重視自己而故意說忙的。我們忙碌的感覺是很真實的。因此，這種現(xiàn)象也被稱為“忙癥”。

　　Data on leisure time suggests we’re not much busier than we were, yet we feel busier, partly because – for “knowledge workers”, anyway – there’s no limit to the number of emails we can get, the demands that can be made of us, or the hours of the day we can be in touch with the office. Work feels infinite, but our capacities are finite, therefore overwhelm is inevitable.

　　休閑時間數(shù)據(jù)表明，我們并沒有比過去更忙，可我們的確覺得更忙了。一部分原因可能是，尤其對“知識分子”來說，每天收到郵件的數(shù)量、我們接收到的工作要求，以及處理辦公事務(wù)所花的時間并沒有一個限額。似乎總有做不完的工作，而我們的精力是有限的，所以難免會覺得有點不堪重負(fù)。

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